How old do you feel today? By the end of this column, I guarantee that you’ll be feeling much, much older.
Seems that each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of that year’s incoming freshmen.
Here’s the latest list:
- The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1982.
- They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and did not know he had ever been shot.
- Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.
- There has been only one Pope. They can only remember one president.
- They were 9 when the Soviet Union broke apart. What Cold War?
- They have never feared a nuclear war. “The Day After” is not a movie but a pill.
- They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up, and Tiananmen Square means nothing to them.
- Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
- They never had a polio shot, and likely do not know what it is.
- Bottle caps have always been screw-off. What’s a pull-top can?
- Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.
- The expression “you sound like a broken record” means nothing to them.
- They have likely never played Pac Man and have never heard of Pong.
- The first Star Wars looks very fake to them, and the special effects are pathetic.
- They may have heard of an 8-track, but chances are they probably never have actually seen or heard one.
- The Compact Disc was introduced when before they were born.
- As far as they know, stamps have always cost 32 or 33 cents.
- They have always had an answering machine.
- Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen a black-and-white TV.
- There have always been VCRs, but they have no idea what BETA is.
- They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
- They were born before Walkmen were introduced by Sony.
- Roller-skating has always meant inline for them.
- The Tonight Show has always been with Jay Leno.
- Popcorn has always been cooked in a microwave.
- They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
- The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as WW1, WW2, or even the Civil War.
- They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.
- They don’t know who Mork was or where he was from.
- They never heard the terms: “Where’s the beef?”, “I’d walk a mile for a Camel,” or “de plane, de plane!”
- They don’t care who shot J.R.
- Michael Jackson has always been white.
- Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not groups.
- McDonald’s never came in Styrofoam containers.
- There has always been MTV.
How do you feel now, old-timer?
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