- Your potted plants are alive. And you can’t smoke one of them.
- Having sex in a twin-sized bed is absurd.
- You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
- 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to sleep.
- You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
- You carry an umbrella. You watch the Weather Channel.
- Your friends marry and divorce instead of hookup and breakup.
- You go from 130 days of vacation time to 7.
- Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as ‘dressed up.’
- You’re the one calling the police because those darn kids next door don’t know how to turn down the stereo.
- Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
- You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
- Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.
- You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald’s.
- Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
- You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.
- Dinner and a movie – The whole date instead of the beginning of one.
- Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 a.m. would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
- You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids, not condoms and pregnancy test kits.
- A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer ‘pretty good stuff.’
- You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
- “I just can’t drink the way I used to,” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
- Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
- You don’t drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
- You read this entire list looking for one sign that doesn’t apply to you!
This top-ranked site now has over 4,000 pages of humor, nostalgia, senior advocacy and useful information for seniors 50+. Updates weekly!
The daily e-zine for everyone over 50 who feels way too young to be old.
"...the perfect mix of Andy Rooney, Dave Barry, and Garrison Keilor, combining knee-slapping humor with useful information and genuine compassion."Retired.com
"Thousands look to and trust Suddenly Senior. Other Websites pale in comparison to the real-life, intimate look into senior lives. What sets apart Suddenly Senior is its blistering honesty and its incomparable encouragement. Millions need guidance."Suzette Martinez Standring
"Best Senior Site ever on the Web! Great, up-to-date information on how seniors can save money on drugs. Wonderful nostalgia. Hard-hitting senior advocacy pieces that get read in high places. Wonderful humor. It's all at Suddenly Senior."Alexa.com